“Clown Prince” Weekly Blather; September 22nd

A Patriotic Response To The “Clown Prince;” 09/22/2012
barackingham Palace,
District of Corruption
September 22, 2012
Hi, everybody. Last week, without much fanfare, Members of the House of Representatives banged a gavel, turned out the lights, and rushed home, declaring their work finished for now. If that frustrates you, it should – because their work isn’t finished. See, when they skipped town, Members of Congress left a whole bunch of proposals sitting on the table – actions that would create jobs, boost our economy, and strengthen middle-class security. These ideas have been around for months. The American people want to see them passed. But apparently, some Members of Congress are more worried about their jobs and their paychecks this campaign season than they are about yours.
Right now, if Congress had done the right thing, we could be on our way to having a veterans’ jobs corps that helps returning heroes find work as cops and firefighters in communities all across the country. These men and women have made incredible sacrifices for our country. They shouldn’t have to worry about finding a job when they get home. But last week, Republicans in Congress voted it down. And then they left.
Right now, if Congress had gotten its act together, we would have a farm bill to help farmers and ranchers respond to natural disasters like the drought we had this summer. And we’d have made necessary reforms to give our rural communities some long-term certainty. But so far, Republicans in Congress have dragged their feet. And now they’re gone.
Right now, if Congress had acted, thousands of responsible homeowners could be saving an extra $3,000 a year on their mortgages by refinancing at historically low rates. But instead, Republicans in Congress decided that working families could wait. And now they’ll have to wait a little longer.
And finally, if Congress had listened to you, they could have given 98% of Americans and 97% of small business owners a guarantee that your taxes won’t go up next year by a single dime. This is something we all agree on. It should have gotten done a long time ago. But Republicans in Congress have refused to budge. They’re holding tax cuts for 98% of Americans hostage until we pass tax cuts for the wealthiest 2% of Americans. And now middle-class families and small business owners are left wondering what their tax bill will look like next year.
[What I’m not telling you: I’m kind’a thinkin’ “Well, maybe ‘turn-about IS fair play’ in this situation.” Remember–just eleven days ago–when my Ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens was brutually murdered by radical MUSLIM terrorists? What did I do…. I left town–to Las Vegas–in favor of cash for my re-immaculation campaign rather than to display even a modicum of my amateurish brand of leadership by leading from behind or leading from the golf course!! I chose instead, to trot out Secretary Hillary Rob’em Clinton to blame the attacks on that video which perports to denegrate the prophet Mohammed. Only the “Governor Romney 47 percenters” actually believed that bullshit!! We–the secretary and I–then wasted $70,000 of confiscated taxpayer money on a video to continue that unbelievable ruse for benefit of the Pakistani public. When all the while–and we were finally forced to admit this–the ever-expanding demonstrations and murders throughout the Middle East are nothing more; nothing less
Now back to my ‘ruse’ on the American voter: My current demands on the Congress rightfully ‘fall on deaf ears!’ I’ve had nearly four years to do something positive for the American economy, for the American jobs markets, for the American taxpayer. Have I?!? “Not on your life!!” I instead wasted what little ‘political capital’ I had on the forced passage of obamaKare, against the will of neary seventy-percent–that’s ‘nearly 70%’–of the Americal public…. even against the will of most of “Governor Romney’s 47%ers!!” I came into rule with the mindset of “It’s my way or the hi-way!” The first two years of my regime, I even had obamacRATic majorities in both houses of Congress and still got very little done beyond obamaKare. Had I used saved the aforementioned ‘political capital’ to be invested in working with the 111th and 112th Congresses, the “Tea Party” Congress, practically all facets of American life would have been improved!
Currently the backlog of legislation in the Congress has been approved by the republicRATically-controlled House of Representatives. The ‘stall’ is in ‘pinky’ reid’s–the “Nevada Nose-Picker”–obamacRATically-controlled Senate, at my direction. To keep the economy debacle, the jobs debacles, the unemployment rate debacle approaching 12%, the foreign policy debacles, the domestic energy debacles; out of the public-eye, I have directed the “Nevada Nose-Picker” to stall all legislation, at all costs!!]
All of these ideas would strengthen our economy and help the middle class right now. All of them are supported by Democrats, Republicans and Independents. There’s no reason to wait. That’s why, after going home and listening to their constituents for a few weeks, Members of Congress should come back in November and do this work. They should do the right thing for veterans and farmers; for responsible homeowners and small businesses; for Americans everywhere who are just trying to get ahead. And if you agree with me, I need your help. Tell your Members of Congress you can’t afford to wait any longer. If you get an answering machine, leave a message. If you see them campaigning back home, tell them in person. Because there’s been enough talk. It’s time for action. That’s what you deserve, and that’s what it’s going to take to move this country forward.
[What I’m not telling you: Beyond my orders to the “Nevada Nose-Picker,” most legislation in the Congress stalls of it’s own accord; all the objectionable, unrelated amendments to individual bills are the cause. The Congress needs to install rules preventing said amendments being attached to current legislation.
I fully understand why the members of Congress left Washington; the same reason I’ve been involved in one hundred, twenty-seven–that’s 127–fundraisers. We’re all in fear of losing our jobs!! Much to the consternation of the federal Department of Education, the American citizen is far more educated; far better read; far more learned in the areas of national politics, history, economics, finance, foreign affairs, energy policies, et al. As much as we–rulers and the Congressional leadership from both major parties–have tried to ‘dumb-down’ the citizen over these past decades, they’ve not taken the bait. Rather than using government–read: public–schools, the parents are trending toward charter- and private schools.
Can you imagine the damage to my ego when I’m electorially “turned out-on-my-ass” in November; when I’m forceably escorted–kickin’n’screamin’–from the barackingham Palace family quarters?!? The pace of my fundraisers–the aforementioned 127–far outreaches those of my recent predecessors, President Ronald–“Ronaldus-Magnus”–Reagan (63); my hero, Jimmuh Cahtah (44); President George H.W. Bush (90); President Bill–“Slick-Willie”–Clinton (76) and President George W. Bush (88). And, AND…. I still have six-weeks to fundraise!! Any guesses what the “Clown Prince” obama grand total will be?!? It’s gonna be a whopper!!!]

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